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Your brain is merely trying to rapidly switch it’s attention between two tasks. It’s shown not only that we’re dumber when we do this (an average of 10 IQ points dumber – that’s the same as pulling an all-nighter.), but that we’re also 40% less efficient at whatever it is we’re doing.But, my favorite part about multi-tasking is that it’s proven that the more you do it, the worse you are at it. It’s one of the only things where the more you practice it, the worse you get at it. I’d argue that what’s happening is that we’re becoming like the mal-formed weight lifter who trains only their upper body and has tiny little legs. Now it’s an opportunity to send an email or a text.This week I’m talking about misunderstandings on headship and submission that can lead to a mindset of entitlement and excusing abuse.I would appreciate your prayers as I always have more to do than I can sanely accomplish.Think about text messages or email alerts from your phone in this context. Can our technology actually help us slow down and see each other as opposed to only transporting us and our attention away from each other?

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You’re training your brain to pay attention to distracting things. When our ancestors, the Geico guys, were sitting out on the savanna and the tree next to them rustled. My favorite summary line on this whole topic comes from Sherry Turkle, an MIT professor who studies technology and society. Digital connections offer the illusion of companionship without the demands of friendship. Now that we’re losing it, we get a sense of just how valuable it was. Besides taking a break from distraction, another step is to ACTIVELY TRAIN your long-form attention and mindfullness. Whatever form it takes, make it a DAILY practice of slowing down. Perhaps the most interesting or provocative approach to solving it, harkens back to that line at the end of the Microsoft commercial – ‘we need a phone to save us from our phones’. There is a small academic movement called Slow Tech.

The more you train your brain to pay attention to distractions, the more you get distracted and the less able you are to even focus for brief periods of time on the two or three things you were trying to get done in your ‘multi-tasking’ in the first place. The ones that didn’t look over and see the lion coming to eat them are NOT our ancestors. We expect more from technology and less from each other”. At the heart of manners is a consideration of others. How many times, guys, have you been barked at by your wife because instead of giving full attention to what she was saying, you were looking at your phone. “There is something more important than you and it’s not here in this room.” The second thing I think we’re losing is creativity and insight. Our mind wanders but it’s not constantly being bombarded with new information (at least until we can take our phones in the shower which I’m sure is being worked on…). Time for our minds to make subtle connections and insights. Simply put, at the heart of creativity, insight, imagination and humaneness is an ability to pay attention to ANYTHING – our ideas, our line of thinking, each other. So, hopefully, by this point I’ve convinced you of a few things No, I think the solution is to balance the DISTRACTING brain training you’re doing every single day with training that strengthens long-form ATTENTION. For some that means leaving the phone and going for a 15 minute walk. The primary insight of the Slow Tech folks is quite interesting. An ability to make real human connection by not signaling that there might be something better on his smartphone to look at.

The ones that did look, only to see it was a harmless bird, are. The second reason is something casinos have known for a long time. Think about your own examples when you felt at your most creative or your best performance. Once people experience the zone, most of us want to get back there. We want to OVERCOME OUR FEAR OF BOREDOM, OUR ANXIETY OF BEING UNSTIMULATED recognize the value of gap time and not have anxiety about it. From sunup Sunday to when I put the kids to bed I do no phone, no email, no TV, no radio. They note that the primary way we’ve used technology over the last 50 years has been in the workplace. An ability to pay attention to a problem for a long time.

The most difficult question I am still receiving (from church leadership) is that Scripture doesn’t allow for "separation," so I am living in disobedience because I am not being submissive to my husband’s desires for reconciliation.

In the video clip I watched tonight, I loved your quote about not valuing the sanctity of marriage over the safety of an individual.

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  4. David again you are taking comments out of context. No one is saying here people can’t change and that God isn’t in the business of transforming people’s lives.

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